Saturday, September 12, 2009

A Blog About Yea High: Mission Statement

Hello, kitties.

Axey here, comin' straight at you with a fresh site, a fresh look, and a freshly scrubbed pair of heavy-duty underoos. I don't break these puppies out for just any occasion.

I decided to name this blog after one of my internet screen-names of old - the one with which I roamed Westeros and the early pre-FaB days of Winter Is Coming. I may or may not relate the story of how I came up with such a stupid moniker, but the short version is it involves me waiting three years to speak to a favorite author of mine, finally getting the chance at a convention he was appearing at... and then completely fucking up the name of something he wrote - so much so that he laughed, corrected my mistake, and called out to the next questioner. "Next!"


(I really thought it was "About Yea High." I erred.)

So you see: I mock the tard. But really, I am the tard.

I'll have more stuff to blog about in the days, weeks, and decades to come. But first I want to lay down the rules for this blog:

There Are No Rules. (There is only Fightclub.)

I talk about what I want. In response, you talk about what you want. Think I'm an asshole? Great! I am! Have a go at me. If it's really amusing I may even come back at you. Don't expect your ego to survive.

The only real line I'm drawing is people spamming commercials onto my blog page. Don Draper is full of shit - nobody really likes commercials. Don't spam my blog with commercials. Other than that, we're cool.

I'm open to offering my opinion on things I know about and things I only have vague opinions about, and, when asked, I'm open to giving advice. But I'm not your dad. I'm not your brother. I'm also not going to fuck you (no matter how nicely you ask). Consider me a shorter, angrier, slightly-perverted version of the nerd uncle some of you have and others wish they did.

So what are we going to discuss?

Everything. I have opinions on a lot of shit. Politics? Religion? Sexuality? The fact that Piers Anthony is a closet pedo? It's all fair game. Let's go.

If you came here hoping for a happy-happy joy-joy blog, well... sure, you'll get that. Every blue moon, when something awesome happens that is totally awesomely awesome, I'll talk about it here.

But mostly I'm here to voice the worldly frustrations I - and many of you, probably - feel.

I'm also here to figuratively slap you in your blushing, offended, entitled little faces, since I don't tolerate whining or emotional overreaction.

This site is not a protective umbrella for anyone. If you can't take the heat, get the fuck out of Axey's kitchen. You're not going to like what he's cooking.


P.S. Ignore the "Published On" date. I just replaced a placeholder post from way back in 2009... back when I said, "I need to save a blog space... somewhere." Today is the 8th day of July, in the 2012th year of our Lawrd.